15_in_my_hand
King Ashcroft: “In My Hand I Hold the Names….”
WASHINGTON, DC- King Ashcroft called an emergency joint session to inform
the nation that he has uncovered a list of 79 baseball players who have
tested positive for steroid use.
“In my hand I hold the names of 79 players who have tested positive in the
anonymous and confidential urine test from last year,” he proclaimed as he
held the paper in the air.
“Rest assured that Bud Selig and I will be dealing with these un-American
athletes severely in time. I give them one chance to come clean and admit
their wrongdoing or I shall read every name from this list next Monday at
10:00AM. I promise that if the players come clean now, Mr. Selig and I will
get them the help and treatment they so desperately need.”
Commissioner Selig said, “The only reason we are resorting to this is
because we are concerned about the players’ health. This is not a witch
hunt. People’s lives are at stake.”
Chicago Cubs manager Dusty Baker stood up and shouted while pointing his
finger, “This is McCarthyism! This is all about getting to Barry [Bonds]!
You all can’t handle that he is the best player of all time, better than the
Great White Hope Babe Ruth!”
Baker was escorted out by force.
Selig said, “Dusty, we understand your frustration. After all, you managed
Barry and were close to him. But he needs help.”
Ashcroft, still holding the paper in the air, said, “Then it looks like I
can read the first name from the list….Number One….BARRY BONDS. Number
Two…coming next Monday at 10:00AM if the players will not turn themselves in
before then.”
“Also, if there are any trainers, managers, coaches, players, and former
players who have ANY information or suspect ANY players of using steroids,
it is your duty as an American to provide me and Mr. Selig with that
information. Thank you all.”
When reached for comment, Barry Bonds just laughed and mumbled something
about a lynch mob.
What does the top word on your shirt say? Is it in Russian letters? cause in russian letters that word means “power”
Im so glad you LIKED it. Do we take it from #1 or #2 LOL
Garcia stays in hunt to end trophy drought: Former world number two Sergio Garcia carded a second bogey-free round…
The Dusty Baker anecdote you could have gone your whole life without hearing
Looking at the numbers it would seem that it would be a no brainer. But the Clintons are consummate politicians and are in it for the power. Regardless of what the numbers say if she gets the nod she will not pick him. Now he may still be on the ticket but she would have to be strong-armed into that decision.
As for as her being a number two. I don't think she is built for that. There's only prestige and a title at being number two and she already has that. There is nothing for her to gain on the other hand it would'nt not be a bad thing if he was number two, as long as he arrived at it fairly.
… *shoves Light into Near's card tower*
you know why the red sox will not leave california with matsuzaka. scott boras, that's why.
i hear reports that both sides have everything to lose, when in fact the only ones who lose is the lions, red sox, and matsuzaka. here's what i mean.
the lions lose because they are the one's who decided for boras to be the agent for matsuzaka, meaning matsuzaka cannot “fire” boras for another agent, nor negotiate for himself. the lions wanted to secure a high posting bid fee, and wanted matsuzaka to get his share; so they hired the agent with the most success in this area. they, as we are learning, shot themselves in the foot.
the red sox lose because they went into the bid thinking two things. first, that they could free up salary by trading man-ram, which did not happen.
second, they thought that scott boras, by some miracle equivalent to proving evolution as fact not theory, would become a decent human being and let them write off the bid fee as part of the salary. that's a big gamble to take, especially with boras.
now the red sox are losing that gamble. some reports are saying that boras loses out because he then would have no leverage with the lions. that is a wrong assessment. the lions are the ones who hired boras to be the agent for their team and matsuzaka. he has all the leverage to get the lions to up his salary should the red sox lose out. and he can use the bid fee as a bargaining chip for next year.
the sad thing is the one who really loses out is matsuzaka. the negotiating rights were taken away from him, by his team, because he cannot negotiate on his own, nor can he fire boras, since he is technically still a seibu lion; and his immediate dream to pitch in the majors this year end bitterly.
the red sox should have known that boras would not budge on what he was asking, bid fee or not, because he doesn't get a cut of that bid fee. 100% of it goes to the seibu lions. matsuzaka doesn't even get a whiff of it. boras is going to want his share, which is 6-10% i believe. the only way he can get that is by signing matsuzaka for a large some of dough, subtracting the bid fee.
my personal feeling is this. even if the red sox do sign him, this will end all boras' credibility in japan and u.s. as an agent. you will see players fire him for someone else, and free agency prices fall back to earth where they should be.
also, if the sox do sign him, you can count on other owners around the league to have commissioner selig investigate the negotiations and contracts to make sure that the seibu lions are not parting with any of their 51 million. because every owner in the league knows that the red sox cannot afford a large contract of this caliber with manny, ortiz, varitek, beckett, drew, and schilling's contracts still at hand.
it's a lose-lose situation for the red sox, lions, and matsuzaka. the sox took a high risk gamble with boras and lost. sorry sox nation, i wish it were differently.
Jon Heyman: Selig had many reasons to act on McCourt but not Wilpons: The reason baseball commissioner Bud Selig…
Out of those two, Firefox.
But Google Chrome is pretty damn good.
If you peaked a look at the video, it's probably because you were interested in it. I'll have you know that I find it highly irregular that you just watched this video only to flame “faggots”. Is it possibly because you're insecure about your own sexuality so you feel the need to fuck around with the ones of others? Pathetic excuse of a human being, even more pathetic excuse of “royalty”, mister prince.
WTF!!!!!
Aclaro, no es que todos los managers deben ahora volverse Billy Martin circa 1980-81 ó Dusty Baker 2003, lo que quiero…
Tom Verducci: The good — and bad — news about MLB's attendance figures: Commissioner Bud Selig has an attendan…
Why did Major League Baseball take over the Los Angeles Dodgers? –
Jimmy are you Homer's dad or something? Who could possibly still have confidence in this guy. Someone that even Dusty Baker has said has too big of an ego and is unwilling to be coached. DUSTY BAKER! The guy was overrated from the start, hasn't proven himself yet, and continues to let down everyone that thinks he's going to be the next “ace” of the future. The only thing he is going to be is the next Paul Wilson. A few good games, but everything else is just a let down.
Boston Red Sox Named First Recipients of Commissioner’s Award for Philanthropic Excellence –
That's a really interesting point, something that I hadn't considered. While I disagree that Selig's legacy will only be the Steroid Era (the Wild Card, making the All-Star Game “count”), that's going to be a big part of it. I strongly believe that Mark McGwire deserves to be in the Hall of Fame and I just as strongly believe that he has very little chance to get in unless he's willing to talk about the past. That “Summer of '98″ is a big part of the history of the Steroid Era and Commissioner Selig's legacy.
We'll think of that later…. GO GIANTS!!!
Oh, Bud Selig is still in town. Of that you can be sure. They haven't finished Game 5 yet, and he really can't escape to safety until they do.
All I'm saying is – Selig is in a hotel somewhere. And you can be sure that hotel has housekeeping. If two idiots in Philly can find a way to smuggle smoke bombs into the Wachovia Center, what do you imagine could happen to Selig at that hotel?
you guuys you are number ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!***************************************!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!********************************************************************!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*I888888888888888*********************
As a Yankee fan, it is my duty to hate the Red Sox and cherish their losses. But, I respect them because they always have a good team and make things interesting. Good Luck to both teams and may the best team come out on top (which will be the Yankess HA!).
Selig In No Rush To Rule On Dodgers TV Deal: Major League Baseball Commissioner Bud Selig finally met with Los A…
Joe,
Is your primary purpose in coming to this site to argue against Barry Bonds and or is it cathartic for you to come to this site and post condescending attacks directed towards Black people? Does the anonymity of this medium provide you with a safe space to show your spite and disdain for Black people without any repercussions except the words that will be posted on your computer screen?
If you have an argument, whether economic, political, social, cultural, or legal against Barry Bonds then make it.
As an aside, I’m white, so I am not sure where I should be placed in your typology of “racists”.
Salut, je suis allé en repdom l'année derniere et la premiere chanson de ta video passait en boucle sur toutes les radios. Connais tu le titre de cette chanson?
Merci d'avance
That was pretty damn good Tommy. I'm impressed.
The two sides require more time to evaluate possible post-trial motions and evaluate the availability of witnesses if there is a retrial, according to a stipulation asking to reschedule the status conference on the case.
suggested reading for you – wikipedia “Deinstitutionalisation&q
RT This Dusty Baker toothpick holder bobblehead that the Reds are giving away is tremendous
Dusty Baker
scalped by the indians hahahahahahaahahahahhahahah where are you my little chowderhead bitchhh
Chicago Cubs News – A contrasting weekend of sports in Chicago: Local fan’s look – Yahoo! Sports –
No, we didn't. But the Central will be better next year.
The Brewers should be able to take the title without sliding as they did last year.
The Reds may improve as well, though I'm not sold on Dusty Baker's managing.
Add to that the fact that the Cardinals well outperformed their stats last year and some of that will catch up to them and you are looking at a bleak 2008.
Rasmus will probably be in Memphis for a while this year. But it'll be intriguing if he's up early.
haha dusty baker in reds uni in #sfgiants dugout
got that
after all this goal occurs in USA
Sorry to hear that.Cubs were a great team.
Let the spirit live on – visit “ayrtonsennaonline” youtube channel
Regards
when they felt they were hurting the country, I would argue it's the Duty of Bud Selig to preserve the game which the fans are
BASEBALL: Votto has more to offer after MVP season –
Worst of Fates, Best of Fates: Dusty Baker’s tenure as Chicago Cubs manager started with a strong 2003, but ende…
RT Somewhere, Bud Selig is smiling #NBAlockout #NFLLockout
Ichiro is a true hero….all the talent and none of the garbage you get with Barry Bonds, Roger Clemens, Andy Pettite, etc.
i wanna play pokemon with them at the moster truck rally!!!!
dont ever swing at a girl you fucking prick…. unless your married lmfao!!!!!
The greatest benefit of Facebook is that it has many groups on the site that you can join. So if you are interested in Chicago Cubs you can research Chicago Cubs in the groups section and you will be able to find friends on there that like the Cubs. This is just one example, I know that you can join groups of your favorite football team, television show, or whatever you want for the most part! If you can't find a group for your interest, you can simply create one!
James
The Intruders: Unreasonable Searches and Seizures from King John to John Ashcroft: